Here is the history of the Ancient World as told by an 8-year-old...

Without the Greeks, we wouldn't have history. The Greeks invented three kinds of colums - Corinthian, Doric and Ironic. They also had myths. A myth is a female moth. One myth says that the mother of Achilles dipped him in the River Stynx until he became intolerable. Achilles appears in "The Illiad", by Homer. Homer also wrote the "Oddity", in which Penelope was the last hardship that Ulysses endured on his journey. Actually, Homer was not written by Homer but by another man of that name.

Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock.

In the Olympic Games, Greeks ran races, jumped, hurled the biscuits, and threw the java. The reward to the victor was a coral wreath. The government of Athens was democratic because the people took the law into their own hands. There were no wars in Greece, as the mountains were so high that they couldn't climb over to see what their neighbors were doing. When they fought the Parisians, the Greeks were outnumbered because the Persians had more men.

Muhahaha!!! *rubs hands with evil glee* I couldn't be bothered with all that thinking and planning stuff. World domination can be a bit of a chore. So! I've invented [OK, I found it elsewhere on the 'net] the Evil Plan Generator that will, er...generate evil plans. Here's mine.

Congratulations on being the creator of a new Evil Plan (tm)!

Your objective is simple: Soul Accumulation

Your motive is a little bit more complex: Mom never loved me

Stage One:

To begin your plan, you must first Traumatize a Chosen One. This will cause the world to sit up and take notice, stunned by your arrival. Who is this Ripe Bastard? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in a Robotic Exoskeleton?

Stage Two:

Next, you will Sabotoge the Internet. This will cause countless hordes of Robot Warriors to flock to you, begging to do your every bidding. Your name will become synonymous with the Spice Girls, as lesser men whisper your name in terror.

Stage Three:

Finally, you will Unleash your Needlessly Big Weather Machine, bringing about Pain, suffering, the usual. This will all be done from a Underground Secret Headquarters of Doom, an excellent choice if we might say. These three deeds will herald the end, and the citizens of this planet will have no choice but to elect you their new god.

 

Check out the site here:  http://www.members.tripod.com/~mrpuzuzu/plan.html